regretting the past
by starfire92
Summary: Kori had a terrible past she can't forget it. After meeting him again she doesn't know what to do. bad summery but gr8 story R
1. I know you

_I was drowning and it didn't take a genius to know I was mere minutes from dying. I tried to swim up but the tides tugged me down. All I could hear was faint screaming. And soon it would all be over for both of us…_

I got up holding onto my throat as if trying to prevent water from entering my throat. I pushed over the large blanket and steeped into my walk in closet and picked out a pink halter top with dark faded jeans and black converse. I got out a bow and put it to the side of my hair.

My eyes were gloomy because of all these wild dreams. They were my past and I felt as if it was just a nightmare and didn't really happen. I had lost each one of my friends, once I finally found my way back to titan's tower it was empty and no one was there.

I grabbed my large purse and began walking out of my small apartment. I tried to avoid taking the bridge that was over a lake, I was terrified of swimming since that day. I went around taking a train to my work.

"First stop central Gotham square." Yelled a man over the intercom. I walked into a large building and saw a cruel sight.

It was Kaitlyn (kitten) she made fun of me all the time just because the fashion magazine chose me over her to model. "So if it isn't Mrs. Fancy Anders, you probably bribed the people here to make you a model" she began to laugh as she watched me walk to Toni (argent)

"Ignore her" Toni said as she smiled to me and took me to the back room

"Kori did you hear, the famous Gotham playboy is moving from Southside Gotham to here!" I saw her put on a dreamy face.

"Who cares he hurts so many girls hearts and he's shallow!" I pitied him, all the girls were famous he never dated a normal girl

"Oh come on Kori! I bet you like him too" I burst out laughing

"I don't love men like him" Toni gave me an annoyed look, every other girl was after him… but for some reason I was different

"I will never understand you Kori" she rubbed her temples as she gave a look of exhaustion of trying to change my mind but I can admit it I am stubborn some times.

Toni grabbed a magazine from a table near us and hugged it. I took it from her and put on a disgusted look.

"Toni get over him!" I said as I threw the magazine to the side.

We both walked to the elevator and went to the second floor. I sat at my station not only was I a model but I was also a writer.

"Kori I will need you to write about this picture" Toni said as she gave me a picture with a description on it.

She left and I felt my eyes tear up a little

_Donna _(super girl) _loses baby in car accident_

_There was a picture with her crying and her husband wrapping his arms around her._

It was the end of the day and I passed by Toni's station and threw the picture to her desk

"Toni I can't write about this" she looked at me curious

"Why Kori?"

"I just can't" I mumbled before leaving I got into the elevator resting my head against the wall.

I got into the train and sat down falling asleep.

"Mrs.… Mrs.…" I heard faintly as I was shaken

"what.." I mumbled before finally waking up and being met by gorgeous blue eyes

"this is the last stop" He looked familiar

"Um...thanks" he walked me out of the train

"What's your name?" he asked casually as he walked to the bridge I stood there scared

"Uh.. Kori"

"What's wrong?" he asked raising an eyebrow

"I'm just going to go around" she said before turning around

"Okay well I'll walk with you"

"you look familiar" I asked

"You do too, but of course you're a famous model"

We were near my house "I never got your name"

"You really don't know who I am?" he asked looking puzzled

I shook my head and he looked surprised

"Well, I guess that explains why your not going crazy over me" he chuckled, all I could do was raise and eyebrow before I frowned and understood what he meant

"It's Richard Grayson" He saw the look on my face change

"Is something wrong?"

"Yes" I mumbled before I got in leaving him very confused

I sunk to the ground I had just had did everything I swore I wouldn't do, and I actually thought he was… was… good looking!

I mentally slapped myself NO! I hate him!

It was going to be a long time until I felt asleep because I felt weird now.

"Uhhh.." I said from my head ach I woke up to find myself on the coach and the TV on.

I looked to the clock and gasped "OH no! I slept in!" I got up and ran to the closet changing into faded jeans with a black stud belt with a black tank top and a large plaid head band on my head. I grabbed my boots and ran out the door running as fast as I could.

Sadly I wasn't looking in front of me to notice myself run into a man

I looked up apologizing and than saw him…

"It's okay" he offered his hand but I got up myself

"I still don't understand what's wrong?" He said as he tried to catch up to me

"I'm fine" I mumbled

"No your not I want to know, did I make you mad?"

"What do you care anyways I'm not famous" I snapped as I made him look a little frightened with my mood swing

"Wow you have worse mood swings than a pregnant lady" he said sarcastically

I cringed at that thought and he had notice

"first of all I do care your different than other girls once they see me"

"I need to go"

"Well I'll come with you were both going to the same place"

My eyes widened

"What do you mean?"

"They want to interview me"

I started walking away from him. But did that stop him no. he didn't get it that I wanted to be alone and cry after that remark of pregnancy

"I noticed you sort of get freaked out when I mentioned that pregnancy thing, you know I was joking right?"

"I know" I mumbled

"why'd you get freaked out"

"Listen I don't want to bore you with my sad stories, I think you get them enough from all your girlfriends" I said and I didn't say it sarcastically I meant it

"I don't mind listening" we had reached the bridge and again I refused to go on it

"Aren't you coming?" he asked me when he went half way and noticed I was walking a different way

"No" I mumbled before he ran off to my side

The rest of the way I had ignored him every question. I herd him say about that I look so familiar about 10 times, he kept saying my eyes looked like his old best friend. I tuned out the rest of the way.

Finally we were there the train had more stops since I was late

I looked to my watch and grew worried of how my boss would react. Toni once was late and lets just say one whole week she was waking up extra early to get muffins and coffee with her money for the whole staff and there's more. Kaitlyn just laughed at that.

"Central Gotham square… Central Gotham square" yelled the man over the intercom

I tried to walk faster than Richard but he ran to my side

"So this is Great Fashion Magazines" He said looking up to the tall building. I took this as an opportunity and began to walk off.

I sighed in relied after losing him.

"Do you always try to lose me?" I jumped when I saw him next to me… how was he so fast

"Uhh how did you do that?"

"Umm… I'm fast" he said rubbing the back of his neck. He had a secret.

"Okay..?" she said realizing him get all worked up

"KORI!" yelled an angry man

"Where have you been, you are late!" yelled a tall man

"Ummm…" is all I could say

"She was showing me around this great area" said Richard as he put a hand on my shoulder. I wanted to throw it off but I played along

"Yea" I played along trying to put on a fake smile

"Oh Mr. Grayson! It is wonderful to see you!" he said before grabbing Richard's hand and shaking it obnoxiously

"It's Richard!" yelled many girls before crowding around him. Kitten pulled me by the hand and pushed me out of the crowd making me trip

"Move you freak!" she said laughing as she saw me trip

"Oh Kori I will need to talk to you about that baby issue" I felt my eyes water up for the 2nd time

Richard had noticed and tried to break through but the screaming girls wouldn't let him

I quickly recovered and ran to the bathroom.

"Kori wait!" he screamed. I ignored and ran to my desk first grabbing a book from the drawer

I tried to make it to the bathroom but instead collapsed and fell to the ground next to the bathroom door.

I opened the book and looked to the first headline

Sandra Grayson soon to be daughter of Koriander, Starfire and Robin (they weren't married yet) under it was a sonogram (pictures of baby in stomach)

Robin wouldn't tell Starfire his real name until they were married so Starifre did the same.

But the accident happened before they could get married or have the baby.

Kori felt someone sink to her side she didn't open her eyes until she heard a gasp

"starifre?"

**Next chapter…**

"Your starfire?"

"I won't forgive you"

"You lost her didn't you, you lost Sandra"


	2. help! skip just authors note

Any ideas for next chap? Please send Review and give me your ideas

-thanks, mira


	3. is this a reunion party?

**Hey I'm trying my best to keep up with this one… its hard with soo much HW. **

**R&R please! It would help a lot!**

**Chap 2**

"Your Starfire?" all I could do was miserably nod

"Starfire it's me!" I looked up questionably … me? It can' t be

"Robin" he said slowly

"get away from me!" I said before getting up leaving the book and running out

"Wait!" he got up running with the book in his hand

Everyone had on a questionable look to me.

"Wait Kori" Toni said trying to get up but stopped when she saw him running after me

I ran until I felt his arm grab me back

"Kori wait please we need to talk"

"I won't talk to you!"

"Kori I need to ask you something" I began to take deep breaths and looked into his pleading eyes

"Kori can you come to my house"

"What!"

"You heard me Kori please this is very important!"

I shook my head as I knew he would bring up memories I didn't want to think about.

He grabbed my arm and pulled me even though I said no, I still let him but I couldn't look to him. I felt so dizzy as if the only reason I let him hold my hand again was because of that.

It felt so odd him holding my arm again I soon pulled my arm away quickly remembering all the memories I didn't want to. I leaned against the car door holding my head from the dizziness.

"Kori are you okay?" he asked as he came to my side.

"I'm fine" I mumbled not looking to him I got into his range explorer

He asked me a few questions but I didn't answer I just shut my eyes tightly and than starred to the road.

We arrived at a large mansion and my eyes went wide this place was gorgeous. Two gates opened to let us in and he parked next to 3 more very expensive cars. He came to my side and opened the door.

He offered me a hand but I just jumped out of the car and kept on walking staying silent all the time.

He opened to large doors and led me in

"you can sit there" he said pointing to the coach

"I'll be right back" he said going up the stairs. I looked to the coffee table to see a picture of a girl with red hair… Wait this was me when I was younger

I put the picture down and tried to hold back tears it was also when I was pregnant.

"Here you might want this after what… what just happened" he set down a tray on the table with an advil and a glass of water.

I grabbed it and put in my mouth swallowing it with most of the water.

"Kori.." I interrupted quick I knew what was coming up

"What did you want to ask so I can leave"

This shocked him and I could tell he was growing sad

"I wanted to ask you where'd you go after that incident" I would have laughed inside this wasn't my fiancé who had disappeared. Technically he was asking if I dated anyone after him.

"When I finally thought I was soon to die someone saved me"

"who?" he said getting a little freaked out

"Roy" I said slowly knowing it would hurt him but who cared he was Gotham cities _"playboy!"_ he probably dated and had you know.. with a lot of girls, to him I was just another victim.

I was probably too naive to know what he would turn out to be, I mean look at him those gorgeous blue eyes, that hair…. SMACK no way!

"he found me washed up against the shore and took me to the hospital" I tried to hide a bracelet on my arm… he healed almost everything I had lost with Robin except for the baby part of course. But after awhile it didn't feel right… I had to break up

I noticed an award silence and tried to break I also noticed his eyes looking at the bracelet as if he was psychic and knew that it was from him.

"Is that all you wanted to ask?" I said timidly as if I was a toddler learning to speak up

"Sandra" I heard him mumble and I acted as if I didn't hear, all the blood rushed to my checks which made it obvious I heard.

"Well I better go" I said quickly

"Kori you heard me now please stay"

I sat defeated, never looking to him, I played with my thumbs and he finally put a hand on them.

I quickly removed it leaving him shocked again.

"Listen Kori, Sandra it was an accident… maybe we can start over"

This made me freak out, what was his problem! he dates millions of girls probably has 20 kids that he doesn't even know there names and now I'm his new target He could just dump after he hits last base.

"You think you can just come back into my life" I screamed his eyes growing wide I saw his mouth open to say something but I didn't let him.

"I'm not going to be a toy to you once your bored with me you move on!" I screamed never letting him talk

"I have feelings, Roy, I couldn't go on with him because of you he purposed and I turned him down because of you but you just dated millions of girls after me!" My face was red and I was very dizzy I held my head almost about to shriek this pain was too much

I got up and left quickly slamming the door, I was crying so badly so much mascara was smeared on my face.

I started running I couldn't let him find me, I could tell he wouldn't be that easy to get rid of.

_I felt flashbacks roll into my mind _

_Me and Roy sat down in front of the ocean we had just finished a wonderful dinner. _

_With him I felt safe just like I did with Robin, I looked into the ocean without feeling all this fright. _

_He stood in front of me and I frowned_

"_Hey!" I teased him_

_He bent down on one knee and said the words I heard from Robin once_

"_Kori I love you will you marry me, I want to spend all my life with you, your perfect"_

_He finished off opening a velvet box with a large diamond ring inside_

_I was speechless… But I refused…_

_End.._

I walked down the lane not looking to were I was going, I needed to calm down. I entered a depressing coffee shop. After all I was depressed.

I went to a small coffee bar area and pulled out a stool to sit on. The girl next to me slammed her book making me frightened. I looked to her she was pretty.

She had long lavender hair which was pretty odd but it matched her skin tone. She wore a black V neck short sleeve top with almost charcoal jeans and a large black leather bag with a pin attached that said 'emotions are useless'

What was it about her that made me feel as if; I've known her for so long.

I decided to start a conversation. "Umm… Hi" I mumbled to her.

She didn't look to me just muttered a "hi" and looked down to her book

"This might sound crazy but do I know you" she looked to me and looked as if she wanted to slap me she bit her lip and I could see her eyes narrow slightly. She had bangs covering her forehead which made her even more pretty.

Now her jaw fell down as her arms yanked me into a hug. I was paralyzed what was going on? First she's mad now she's happy, didn't her pin say emotions are useless?

She pulled me out of the café to the alley and I look really confused.

"What's going on?" I shouted looking to her

"Starfire?" You don't remember me?" she said

"Wait Raven?" I said gasping for air were all the teen titans doing this weird reunion or something first Robin now her

She nodded smiling, she looked different

"I thought you died when Robin broke me the news, does he know your alive!" she said all really fast… wait this wasn't Raven's style.

I looked down to my shoes.

"Does he?" she repeated more monotone

"Who cares about him" I said looking up to her

Rachel decided to drop the subject

"Oh ya my new names Rachel now"

"Mines Kori now" I said happy she dropped it

"So do you want to come to my house? We can catch up" she said putting on a small smile

I looked down first was I up to talking, she'd probably ask about Robin…

"Uh.. sure" I said, who cared about him I missed my best friend

She pulled me by the arm to a black BMW. I got in as she started the car.

"Rachel what was up with you in the beginning?"

Rachel narrowed her eyes once again

"I just got a divorce" WAIT! WHAT Rachel was married

"What! To who"

"Melchior" she said slowly as we got out of the car and into her house. She had a not to big house but it was nice.

She threw her purse to the floor. And I looked around wow it was nice.

I sat down as she brought me some herbal tea. I needed it badly half of me was happy and half of me wanted to go and beat up someone just to get my frustration out.

_(Richards P.O.V)_

He was stunned what was going on! he did love her… he looked down to the floor and than noticed something black. He picked it up to see a purse… wait (this can't turn out good)

Curiosity took over, he looked through the bag to find a wallet, a cell phone, an id, and picture of him… and wow! Diary…

He opened it to see writing all over

_Diary entry number 1 September 21, 2003_

_I'm pregnant! ( he guessed it was from a few years ago) I can't belive this its Mine and Robin's child! I don't know how to tell him… Wait if he gets mad or happy it's a chance I have to take but I can't now… he's obsessed again over slade sometimes I doubt his love for me… _

He flipped a few pages and looked to the year _2005_

_Diary entry number 79 November 4, 2005_

_Roy purposed to me, I didn't want to hurt his feelings but I declined it didn't feel right after him… I can't go through that again. I mean Roy almost healed my broken heart but he's not Robin…_

Robin couldn't read anymore he felt guilty.

_(Kori's P.O.V)_

I had just finished my talk with Raven and was walking home.. Melchior used her, he never loved her just like him… its amazing how boys can be such… such backstabbers!

I walked home and than panicked… UH OH! My bag! I almost screamed I quickly pulled off the welcome matt to grab an extra key and finally opened the door panicking.

I heard violent ringing and saw that my home phone was ringing I picked up the phone and than dropped it out of shock.

**Im soooo srry for the long wait hw sooo annoying but I was off today because I'm sick so I decided to catch up with this. R&R**


	4. accident

**Heres the next chapter, I'm not gonna update until I at least get 10 new reviews for this chapter … so R&R! please!**

**Interesting chapter (heads up Kori lets Richard stay with her, and Kori has a terrible accident)**

This must be a nightmare! A terrible nightmare it had to be! He has my phone, my id, umm… oh shit! He has my diary!

I picked up the phone and listened to him. "Kori you want your stuff don't you" he said, he knew I had to pick up my stuff sooner or later I needed my phone my id and especially my diary! Oh…! Wait if he read it! That jerk it's so like him to do something like this he is a superhero isn't he?

I didn't answer, could you imagine you're ex fiancé actually on the phone with you trying to make a deal with you. I finally spoke up

"Just drop it off at my job I don't want to see you!" Richard sighed on the other line

"First of all Kori you'll have to see me, you're the one who's interviewing me tomorrow" My eyes widened! Was this truly happening!

"I'll just drop it off at 153 N. Gotham dr." he said slickly, I felt adrenaline burst into me, I was too stressed

"Do you enjoy torturing me face it I'm not one of your dumb girl friends that you dump after a few months" I said rudely

"I'll be there in ten" he said before closing the phone

"UHHHH!" I screamed pushing over a picture frame, it shattered on the floor and some how it relieved some of the stress

O shoot why'd I do that! I can't control my anger sometimes, it was too much.

I looked in the mirror to see my eyes glowing green and green orbs in my hand

"No!" I shouted as I sunk to the floor, I tried to never get this stressed I tried to forget my powers, if I got too angry I could lose it and hurt someone badly, I couldn't do that at least not again…

I got up ignoring the pieces of glass on the floor… maybe he could think I was psycho and leave me alone! I knew better though he was obsessed and until I dated him he wouldn't leave me alone!

He changed so much when I was a titan he was mine… mine only and vise versa.

I heard a knock on the door maybe if I didn't answer he would go away. That didn't work he had my keys! That bitch! He opened the door to find me on the floor my eyes green with small green orbs in my hands.

I tried to calm myself, they soon disappeared but he looked frightened by the glass on the floor he assumed the worse.

"Kori what did you do?" he asked picking the glass up and throwing it in the trash

"Nothi- OUch" I shouted as a piece cut my wrist

"Your hurt" he said as he looked down to my bloody wrist

"Its nothing I'm fine" I said as I sat down and put my unhurt hand on my wrist, it didn't work my wrist was bleeding too much. I looked at my hand that I tried to stop the bleeding it was all dark red. I began to feel dizzy.

Richard ran inside to grab a napkin and some alcohol.

"Kori your going to lose to much blood" he said as he dabbed the wipe with alcohol.

I shrieked in pain as he kept dabbing it ignoring my shrieks. I finally pulled away my arm since he just ignored my warnings

"That hurts!" I shouted

He sighed as he threw my purse into my lap

I grabbed it happily and put it to my side.

"Thanks, you can leave now" I said

"I don't intend to, I sort of have a problem with my house…" he said timidly

"what…" I said rolling my eyes

"We had a pipe break under the wood floors the house has too be repaired"

"And you want to stay here…" I said crossing my arms

"Please Kori I won't bother you at all" Shoot! There goes those beautiful pleading eyes! Uhhh! I gave up

"how long?"

"Only 2 days I won't be here most of the time" he said sort of happy

"Fine" I gave up as I got up.

He followed me to my bedroom were I pointed to the bed

"You can sleep here I'm sleeping on the coach" I said

"Its your house" he argued

"You can sleep on the bed I'll sleep outside" I said getting angry

"Its okay I'm fine with the coach" Now I got pissed

"Fine I'll sleep on the bed" we both said at the same time crossing our arms, I sat down on the bed

"You know what! We'll both sleep on the bed, GOOD NIGHT!" I screamed

I walked into the bathroom to change into a purple tank top pj with matching shorts

I got out to see him in a white top with boxers on … wow he's so handsome SLAP, note to self I need to stop thinking that way!

He was already in bed with his eyes closing

I got in and tried to get as far away from him as I could.

"Good night" he said nicely, what did I do! I just agreed to sleep with my ex fiancé just because I got frustrated over the fight!

"Ya what ever" I said moody

Before I knew it I was fast asleep… it was weird sleeping next to him again...

I woke up to the thunder storm a little frightened. Oh I forget to mention my fear of thunder storms… must of slipped my mind.

I almost jumped the second time I heard it. Unwillingly because of my fear I got closer to him which put a small smile across his face.

I wonder what he's dreaming of…

I held onto the covers tightly as I felt a hand slip around my waist. I almost panicked but I let him keep it as if I liked receiving small hugs from him.

When I woke up I found my head against his chest I felt to safe around him. Maybe I should give him a second chance I didn't know what to do. I argued with my angel that kept screaming give him another chance! And my devil that said kick him out!

I pretended to sleep in case he wakes up and finds I was okay with this. I felt him yawn and than remove his hand from my waist he got up and walked out of the room.

I slapped my forehead what was going on I couldn't tell if I liked him or not it was complicated. I felt as if it was forbidden to fall in love with him again. But I also felt I should try to get back together.

I walked out the room after 15 minutes of arguing with myself. I wore a purple tank top with ripped jeans. I also wore a large purple headband with small polka dots on it. I wore chestnut fur ugg boots.

I walked down the hall to see a note on the dresser

I picked it up to find

_Kori I can tell your not comfortable with me staying so I thought of going back to my apartment in south Gotham for a few months_

_Richard _

Now I felt bad, I had to admit my feelings to him before he was gone. I ran to my car feeling so guilty that I didn't tell him before.

I started my silver mercades and I was off I was pretty sure he would take a train but not the one we usually go on.

I drove to a large bridge, larger than the one to the other train station. Oh no I was terrified of being on this.

I took a deep breath before I got onto the high speed bridge. Everything was going well until I head obnoxious beeping thinking the guy was probably nuts I didn't notice what he was honking at.

I looked back to see all the cars behind me going backwards quickly or changing lanes. Than I noticed what terrified them.

Some crazy driver was going at least 120 miles and hit me making my car swivel all the way to the side of the bridge. I held onto the steering wheel tightly.

I looked down in the window to see a large fall and lots of dark water. I paniked as I noticed the only thing keeping me up was the tire in the back that were stuck to something.

I had to get out and try to get onto the bridge or I would die, I opened the door and noticed the car starting to swing more. I tried to slowly get out of the car.

What terrified me next was the view. I began to grow very dizzy and the worse thing happened next.

_(Richards P.O.V)_

Richard was driving to the bridge until he noticed all these cars blocking the way and people panicking.

He got out and ran to a girl with a child. Who were terrified on what was happening.

"What's going on" that poor girl was hit by a crazy driver and is about to die. She said as she held onto her child and pointed to a car almost falling.

Richard ran to the bridge to see a terrible sight. Kori was holding onto the car door with one hand and dangling over the water.

"Kori!" he screamed as he put out a hand to try to grab her.

Kori looked up to try to grab his hand but the car only swung more violently.

Richard stretched all the way until his hand was close to hers

"Kori grab my hand" she looked up terrified and tried to grab his hand but the car swung one time more violently until Kori had to let go.

Richard heard her screaming and didn't know what to do, he saw her drop for the second time and last time it wasn't this big of a fall. He did the only thing he could do…

**Ya srry short chap pls R&R next chap gets intresting**


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